Which realm do we live in? What is “reality”

I am about 2 seconds from falling into a very deep sleep so I apologize in advance for the random ramblings, the spelling errors, and the grammatical ones too. Just had a thought I really wanted to put out there!

I sleep these days, about 8-9 hours… about a 3rd of my day. But in reality, it feels more like half my day… half my day I’m sleeping, half my day I’m at work lol.

During covid we’ve all been stuck at home… and the longer this goes on, the crazier it feels. Like we’ve been holding our breath for a really long time. Like we are stuck in this reality and that reality is a nightmare. As I held my breath, I suddenly thought about all those discussions on existence. The questions asking about “do we really exist?” and, “What’s the proof?”

I think, therefore, I am?

My mind started doing that thing where it goes on a tangent, and I realized there are two equally real realms in which we exist. The first being this so called “reality”… and the second being the dream realm. In our dreams the “Covid reality” doesn’t exist. Life is usually normal, sometimes weird, but normal in its own way. Especially when we’re having a positive dream!

Last night I dreamt that I was able to see and hang out with my best friend, Anna! I haven’t been able to do that very frequently at all this year and it’s been rough to do the year without seeing her every few months! It was calming. In my dream I also went on a vacation with my husband, Sagar… and that FELT amazing. It felt so real… each emotion I felt, each thought I thought, was so realistically induced. What’s to say I didn’t also exist in a different, alternate reality?

Perhaps allowing our dreams to become our reality, and our reality to become just a dream (a nightmare) is how we will survive this grim period. After all… they do feel pretty darn similar!


I’m sure you read the title and terror ensued within each cell of your body. And for that I’m offended. Thanks Hitler. You were possibly the worst man on the planet.

I’ve sat on this topic for years but it’s high time we open it. Controversial, only because the entire Western Hemisphere is as ignorant as ignorant gets.

Note I said “Swastik” not the butchered “Swaastika” that everyone in the Western Hemisphere has come to hate. It’s Swastik. And I’m sick and tired of being judged for why it pops up in so many Asian and Indian videos, photos, and ceremonies. I’m sure all Buddhists and Hindus are. I’m tired of it being affiliated only with the Nazis, when it wasn’t their thing to take to begin with because they stole it, and it’s so deeply and personally hurtful that this is ALL the rest of the world knows.

First and foremost, I mean no disrespect to the Jewish people. What happened to your ancestors I take very very seriously and I am mentally and emotionally distraught whenever I watch a documentary or hear a story from that era. I have studied the Holocaust thoroughly. I’m not Jewish, but my personality doesn’t allow me to be emotionally ignorant about what happened. My discussion today is not to minimize what happened thanks to Hitler… but rather to uncover yet another chunk of the world Hitler also destroyed (in addition to all of the horrific things he did) that no one seems to know about. To help the world understand who else Hitler destroyed in addition to the Jewsish, admittedly in a different way… of course physically in a much lesser way, when he stole an entire identity and redefined it to symbolize hate. Forever.

Imagine what would happen if someone, a non believer of the Christian like religions, took the cross tomorrow and used it to discriminate and hate and KILL an entire race of people for no good reason. Imagine if an Indian, for example if we flipped the scenario, took the cross and convinced the world that it was the sign of hatred, and murder. Imagine if because of this the rest of the world decided to hate the cross, or any other religious symbol without making an effort to understand its origins. What it really means. That’s what Hitler did. A disgusting European white man STOLE an extremely important Hindu, Buddhist, similar religions symbol (the swastik) and used it to spread hate. Without asking for any permission. He destroyed and killed the Jewish people, and along with them, he destroyed the reputation of an entire ancient and sacred religion – to no fault of our own. And it’s VERY annoying.

In Hindu ceremonies, you literally cannot complete some rituals without the Swastik. I’m going to defend my culture and say it’s not fair to ask us to change or alter rituals that have existed for thousands of years (literally longer than most religions and races have even existed) just because this idiot 100 years ago decided to abuse it. However, I’d love to come to an understanding about how we can have it back without hurting sentiments. Not that thing we let the white people borrow, no… I’m talking about that thing the white people stole. Ironically, I’m nicely asking how we can have our stolen symbol back.

On a global level… it has been accepted again and returned to the rightful owners. But unfortunately, no one has been informed of this… no one has been educated on this. So I decided to blog about it today to at least start the convo, plant the seed, hope you start looking into what it actually means and what it actually is. I wrote the blog in hopes that people won’t take it the wrong way, but instead will take a moment to think about what I’m saying.

In the meanwhile, I want to know how can we have our extremely religious symbol back while still respecting the Jewish community?

I also want to know, how the hell do we get these idiotic NEO-Nazi idiots to STOP FREAKING USING OUR RELIGIOUS SYMBOL ALREADY TO CONTINUE SPREADING HATE.


America – you HATE cultural appropriation and yet you believe in, and encourage the worst possible appropriation EVER. An appropriation where a cultures identity (Aryans, Swastik) was taken, and used for the worst!

I’m not going to sit here and explain what the Swastik is because I’m hoping this blog will encourage you to do your own research and then get back to me with answers. But yes, I and my fellow Hindus, Buddhists, and similars, are SICK and TIRED of Europeans and Americans abusing something so important to us, and then deciding how the world should feel about it. Sickened because I feel for the Jewish sentiment, but at the same time feel punched in the gut because it was my symbol used against my will to make someone else feel so horrifically miserable. Not just feel, but they were treated, absolutely treated, in the most inhumane and disgusting way.

But for the record when you start researching, you’ll realize that the Swastika is the most ancient symbol symbolizing positivity, growth, and well-being in the world, it exists in almost every Asian country, and even so far back as to the Norse. It existed in Native American culture, in Japanese culture (manji), Ancient Greeks, Celts, and even ancient Eastern Europeans. It is the ONLY symbol that has had the exact same meaning across all these ancient cultures that supposedly didn’t even know of one another’s existence. It was literally carved into the walls of caves from when humans lived in Cave. Yes that’s how ancient it is.

Now please, look it up. Please look it up and see this previously hidden part of the Damage Hitler caused. The part that finally needed to be uncovered, be known by the world because us Indians/Asians are sick and tired of just tolerating being shit on and saying nothing about it… this just being ONE example.

But I guess we can start somewhere.

Two Kinds of People?

There’s two kinds of people – metaphorically speaking, those who like to play house… and those who know when to play house.

In any given situation… there’s a rushed way to do things vs a particular time to do things. I’ll preface this by saying, there isn’t always a right time to do things – but there is a wrong time to do them.

As I grow up, I realize this more and more in my own life as well as the lives of those around me. There are some people who choose to do certain things when they don’t have the means to do them… diving head first without considering the consequences… and there are people who evaluate their means first…

Then of course, metaphorically speaking, there are people who are too cautious to play house at all. But what fun is not playing at all…


So then I guess there are actually THREE kinds of people 😂

….but in any case, Balance is key.

Things to keep in mind when you say something nasty about someone else

I mean sure we all have things to say when we’re bothered by something… but I’m sure we all know those people who are CONSTANTLY complaining about other people. CONSTANTLY looking for things to hate about someone else. If they can’t find anything noteworthy they’ll make up things to complain about. And if they really can’t find something they’ll attack a person’s personality or physical appearance. The weirdest part is when the same group of people have something nasty to say about each other, the subject just changes depending on who isn’t present!

Unfortunately, there’s nothing we can do about it when we find ourselves on the receiving end of that. Recently I found myself in the presence of an acquaintance (3 days in a row) who walked in the door complaining about other people. Their decision making skills. Their strand of hair that was still on the chair. Their personality. I mean I don’t even think person A has seen person B in well over a week or two but I couldn’t believe how much person B was getting figuratively assassinated just because. I realized that the same must be happening to me when I’m not around.

I think when we find out someone had something negative to say about us we take it personally and feel bad about it… furthermore when it’s something that’s not in our hands – such as our appearance or personality. Even more so, when we genuinely try to be a kind loving humane person, and get nothing but crude harsh judgement in return. So I made a list of things I need to realize if I ever find myself in this situation. You should too… or you can use my list and tweak it as you see fit to apply to your life!

My List:

  1. I’m happy with who I am
  2. I know I’m a good person
  3. I know I try my hardest, even if I’m not always perfect
  4. I know I’m good at what I do regardless of your standards
    1. I’ve fixed your mistakes too, or noticed plenty of flaws in you too… I just don’t feel the need to point them out to you every time, or micro-analyze them.
  5. You’re actually just creating a bad impression in MY mind
    1. I now think of you as negative energy/vibes
  6. I have an amazing family that loves me (so I couldn’t care less about your views)
  7. I have amazing friends that love me (so I couldn’t care less about your views)
  8. I have an amazing husband who loves me so much he spoils me, and is the only person whose opinion about my personality and appearance at this stage in life REALLY matters. (I am not trying to befriend you, date or impress YOU, so I don’t actually care about what you think)
    1. Since we’re being shallow, before you judge me, have you looked in the mirror? When was the last time you – washed/combed/brushed your hair, took a shower, didn’t have your hair shed, got a haircut, ironed your clothes, went to the gym, had good posture, etc
  9. Before you comment on how much I talk and like to have conversations, have you looked at how much you complain – or how judgmental you are? I think my desire to have a conversation is a sign of my intellect, empathetic nature, friendliness, and desire to connect with my fellow human beings.
    1. I don’t judge you for your lack of ability to have a conversation (at least not consciously, and not out loud), but if I did, I’d judge you to be shallow, robotic and depending on the situation, I’d think you were incapable of having an intellectual conversation all together.
    2. I’d also judge you for lacking humanity, empathy, and the ability to connect with other people (unless they, like you, just like to spend their time complaining)
  10. I personally have gone through so much worse… I’ve danced with death and came back from the edge. I’m strong. If I survived that… what could you possibly do to make a dent my emotions? You’re literally a nobody in front of some of the folks and actions I’ve had to deal with.

So basically if I ever find myself on the receiving end of such a person’s negativity (knowingly) – yes I’ll probably feel bad… but then I’ll remember that such a person wasn’t around to wipe my tears or chase my fears… so they don’t get to cause fears and tears either. I’ll remember the 10 points above and realize…

I just don’t care! Because such people just don’t matter 🤷🏻‍♀️