Month: October 2018

My Hero.

My hero is the personification of kindness. Of having a big heart. My hero loves with the passion and intensity that justifies the emotion. My hero cares about the things that matter to me. My hero protects me, stands up for me, shields me against the world. My hero is strong yet simultaneously gentle. My hero literally saved my life (cause my life is innately such a movie). He opened his heart to me amidst a difficult situation. He gave me the chance I deserved, without judgement. He saw me for who I was. He saw my soul, not my baggage. Most importantly… He fearlessly plunged into the swamp of fear, uncertainty, distrust and bitterness and retrieved the lively, bubbly, talkative, and vivacious version of me that existed 4 years prior.

In summary:

He listened. He loved. He protected. He saved.

He gave me back myself.

And he didn’t stop there. He worked on giving me the ability to trust again. He worked hard to coax me out from the darkness and into the sunlight.

Even his imperfections played a heroic role giving me the ability to finally exercise my own feminine nature – of nurturing, loving, caring, and guiding.

Maybe he’s just being normal… cause that’s what normal people do when they love someone. But to me he is extraordinary. He’s done all of these things that weren’t easy and crossed each obstacle… always victorious, always standing tall.

Always standing behind me with unwavering support.

Unwavering love.

How else do I describe a hero? I couldn’t until now… but now I have: He’s the person who leaves a constant smile on my face.

My Hero.

So now, especially now, I have to say that when you suspect someone of playing games, or being shady… your hunch is almost always right.

Therefore always investigate further.

No matter how much the other person complains and tries to make you the bad person for being “annoying”… always investigate why you suddenly have a bad feeling.

Who knows… your story’s antagonist may be committing an illegal crime against you right behind your back. And while all bad acts eventually get caught… wouldn’t it be nice if they could get caught sooner than later?

So yeah… life tip #739927373: investigate all doubts and (bad) hunches

 

In this new phase of life (for me) – filled with happiness, laughter, no-reason smiles, and an overjoyed heart… I’ve actually had a lot of time to think about how I feel… and why I feel the way I feel. What makes present day so… content? So happy?

Well for one I purged my life of all negativity and filth. But that’s not enough to bring random unintentional smiles to one’s lips.

I realized that I mindlessly smile a lot these days because I chose to also only surround myself with people who truly want me to be happy, who thrive off of my happiness… not my tears, and not off of what they can benefit from me. From negative relatives to leech-like friendships, from “going out of my way” favors to being a resource for people who don’t respect or deserve it… I cut all of this out… leaving only the inner most layer of relationships that matter.

But the most important thing that has made a world of a difference is that I am in the company of an amazing, vivacious, dedicated and loving person who chooses to focus all of his attention, emotion on me… only me… and in turn automatically causes me to focus all of mine on him. And it is such a breath of fresh air! Suddenly no one else, nothing else matters. Suddenly “love” makes sense. Suddenly I realize what this “no one else matters” really means… what it feels like.

Comparing this interaction to what I see around our little bubble… I realize what is key is respecting boundaries. The two of us… we respect boundaries. We respect each other… and because of that we learn and know what line is not ever ok to cross.

With this Dear Partner, I am so so grateful for you 🙏🏻

Now comes the Vent that actually has nothing to do with me (other than making me realize how good I have it… lol) —

Recently, I realized half the population doesn’t know how to respect those boundaries rightfully set in place by a relationship. These disgusting people, men and women alike, infest the earth, trying to infiltrate  someone else’s “good thing”. Literally… between acquaintance’s Facebook statuses and people I personally know/know of… I’m shocked by how easy it is to be in a perfectly healthy relationship and still try to catch the eye of another. Try to flirt with another, an ex, or cheat with a stranger… physically or emotionally.

Yes, no relationship is perfect… but as long as it isn’t toxic, or abusive… as long as your spouse respects you and puts in the effort… how can one be so blatantly disrespectful of boundaries. How can relationships be such free for all’s? Why even get into a relationship if you want everyone’s eyes and hands on you? You wanna have fun? Do it! Just not at the cost of someone else’s trust and happiness. Cause let’s be honest… if a relationship was really that nasty then you’d just get out of it instead of working on it. And yes… trust me… I know and do believe in special cases where a person is so unhappy… stuff happens…things go wrong… but those are not the situations I’m discussing. I’m talking about the unforgivable ones.

I’ve truly come across cases where a person is perfectly comfortable in their marriage even… wants to be with their spouse but also wants attention from several other people simultaneously. And I truthfully do not get that. At all. Leaving your partner in the dark while you engage in all kinds of sick behavior behind their back… simultaneously lying to your partner making them feel like they’re all that matters. Playing games.

I’ve said this before – being loved by someone is a privilege. It’s not a right. So when a privileged person chooses to simultaneously engage in such behavior it’s called cheating. They’re cheaters. It’s utterly disrespectful to the person who loves you. It’s a complete lack of respect for boundaries.

Bottom line – It is disgusting. Cut it out. Or I genuinely hope your partner/spouse finds out.

✌🏼