Who I am… vs who I am…

Huh? Lol, weird title.

But the truth is that as I grow into myself, I realize that who I am does vary greatly from who I am. Yeah yeah, I know it sounds confusing. What is this crazy girl rambling about. Why is she rambling when she isn’t even going to go into specifics.

Let me explain it simply. I’m starting to realize, who I am (like at the core, deep down inside) isn’t all that identical to who I am as a person.

There are times I feel like who I am, what I believe in, how I choose to live my life are heavily influenced by the morals and values instilled in me by my upbringing and my environment.

Who I am, however, has been heavily influenced by my experiences. It’s been heavily influenced by my experiences challenging what used to be my understanding of my/the world.

I’ll occasionally find myself wanting to do something (don’t worry, nothing horrible), feeling it’s 100% justified in my newer understanding of the world… but I won’t do it because it heavily contradicts the beliefs I have that I was brought up with.

Yeah it’s vastly confusing. Maybe even at this point most of you have no idea what I’m rambling about. But for the few of you that do – I’d love to hear your thoughts 1:1 🙏🏼

Jaded

Where does our innocence go?

In that first moment out of our mother’s womb…. that first moment when we open our eyes, and take our first breath – we are in our most innocent form.

Not yet tainted by the worlds vices and corruption. The color of our skin doesn’t matter. The barriers of beliefs don’t exist.

We don’t have experiences to jade us, influences to negatively affect us.

In that first moment we are a blank sheet of paper, who’s life is about to start being penned.

So where then does it go?? When does it go? Is it from that next moment – where paper meets pen?

Credit: https://www.flickr.com/photos/zengei/6943077858