Huh? Lol, weird title.
But the truth is that as I grow into myself, I realize that who I am does vary greatly from who I am. Yeah yeah, I know it sounds confusing. What is this crazy girl rambling about. Why is she rambling when she isn’t even going to go into specifics.
Let me explain it simply. I’m starting to realize, who I am (like at the core, deep down inside) isn’t all that identical to who I am as a person.
There are times I feel like who I am, what I believe in, how I choose to live my life are heavily influenced by the morals and values instilled in me by my upbringing and my environment.
Who I am, however, has been heavily influenced by my experiences. It’s been heavily influenced by my experiences challenging what used to be my understanding of my/the world.
I’ll occasionally find myself wanting to do something (don’t worry, nothing horrible), feeling it’s 100% justified in my newer understanding of the world… but I won’t do it because it heavily contradicts the beliefs I have that I was brought up with.
Yeah it’s vastly confusing. Maybe even at this point most of you have no idea what I’m rambling about. But for the few of you that do – I’d love to hear your thoughts 1:1 🙏🏼
From a mind that spends a lot of time thinking... 
🙂 You will realize this even more as you grow older! At certain stages, (the beliefs then vs the what you really are) they will conflict. It may sometimes feel a battle since who you are would want to fight with the other who you are. The best part is now I can conveniently choose between the two 🙂 Initial few years it was a battle.
I loved this. I feel who I am clashes with who I am almost everyday. Some days more than others. We deal with a lot, coming from 2 clashing cultures!
And stop calling it rambling, you have such good and valid points in your piece…or maybe I’m just crazy too 🤪
Hehe ❤️ thanks girl!
And yeah the 2 cultures part majorly adds to it! To some extent being married to someone from India even more so! It makes me wonder who I’d have been and what experiences I would have had that would have shaped me!😄